Sunday 11 November, 2007 – 09:53 by Swannie rambling along, trying to avoid censorship.
I really can spell. But I live in fear of censors who seem to take objection to any word that seems of questionable taste.
As times passes, both the details of my coma-induced nightmares and their horror I remember at the time seem to fade. Perhaps talking about them is the catharsis that professionals such as me talk about is actualy happening. On the other hand, while most women seem to be well-aware of the pain of childbirth, it doesn’t take them long to feel it only as a memory before they get clucky again. Maybe a similar situation is involved.
One nightmare I had while in a coma resulted me being damaged so badly that death seemed inevitable. So I forced an escape into a dream within a dream, a situation were while I was still human, but humanity had evolved into sea-dwellers who took nourishment and solace directly from the ocean. Basically, I went to a better place to die.
I recall swimming deep within the ocean, actually feeling my body growing stronger as I absorbed energy and nourishment from my surroundings. As I was enjoying the warm caresses of this ocean, I heard two female voices. My eyelids were closed, so I could not see them. But I recall telling them that I needed to void my bowels, but not to worry, since the water would wash away the evidence. When I felt they understood and were well-clear of any outfall, I relaxed and felt the blessed release of bodily relief. Then there were a few moments of activity on their behalf, and blackness descended.
I don’t know how long it took before I returned to enough consciousness to become somewhat more aware of my surroundings. I really would like to apologise to those nurses who were giving me my daily bedbath!